Monday, September 22, 2014

You just can't make this shit up...

Seriously, when it comes to my dating really have to stop and ponder, how does this shit happen.

Well, it does start with crappy taste in men.  Clearly that is the historical pattern.  Yes there have been some good ones, but the serious ones are crappy.  However, the VERY good news on this front is that the choices are getting better.  The last is never quite as craptacular as the one before.  So let's celebrate that moment.

As for the rest...buckle up because this is an 18 month tale you will can't make this shit the end.

So we know that historically, the EX was the worst of the worst.  Ultimate fail.  Then there was NODIY.  While he might of won in the category of not physically abusive to me, there was the emotional abuse as well as just the slob factor.  Then came along ATM man shortly after NODIY finally packed up his junk and got out.  It was a victory with no physical or emotional abuse...but he had this other issue.

Oh the hope for ATM was there.  We had so many things in common.  Both single, never married, no kids.  He played professional baseball for awhile, enjoyed golf, had a good career, his own place and seemed like an overall decent guy.  But, we know as I go...they can never be normal and if they seem too good, it definitely is too good to be true.

Things started going downhill with ATM in the fall of last year.  He was always "too busy" with work to do anything.  According to him he had events, and all these other things going on with work that he didn't have time to date or do anything.  We would still do things, it was just few and far between.  We agreed that we were "dating" but we were not committed to each other and were allowed to date other people.

Being at the point that I was over men, I was okay with it.  It was what it was.  On the night of my birthday, I got a text from some random chick claiming that she was dating him and that there were others, blah, blah blah.  The ironic factor on it was that we were actually out to dinner for my birthday when I got it.  Obviously he and I had a talk about it and really didn't think too much of it.  We were dating, we were free to go out with other people.  I had gone out on random dates here or there in my quest to find the right guy but nothing had panned out.  Apparently the other chicks in this email distribution were not under the same understanding and the catfights were classic.  It was actually comical to sit back and watch it unfold because I knew where I stood with ATM and clearly they had zero idea.  Obviously it started to give me insight into who he really was.

Then came March and ATM attended the Round Rock Express game (our Triple A team) with me.  It was a work function in which we had Suite tickets and a lot of the execs from work were there.  Of course, he did what he does best and used it as a networking function.  Well, during the course of the game, I happen to see one of his text messages he received that said "I love you and appreciate you."  Instinct took over and I knew that was more than someone he was just "dating".  Of course, I was 700 hundred shades of pissed off but really couldn't deal with it in the moment as we were surrounded by work people.  Last thing I needed was them involved in is my stupid dating drama.

Well, according to HIM, she was someone through work that passed loans his way, etc.  He tried to explain that she was married, had two kids, her husband was in the legislature, how he didn't like they way they talked to each other, blah, blah, blah.  Of course, I am not an IDIOT and I was not born yesterday and your lies do not fool me.  Let's just say he was in a tailspin by the next morning when I informed him that they WERE married and he forgot to mention the divorce they got in 2007.  Apparently the fool didn't realize that people in the legislature have public records.  Because I am also very crafty in my research, I was able to track her down.    In his mind, he was dating her (AKA JDC) and was in love with her, never mind he was in my bed the day before.  Seriously, you are a jack ass.   I gave him through the weekend (it was a Thursday) to come clean with her.  I informed him that I was going to follow up with her too ensure he told the truth.  It's one thing to deal with this shit, it is another to know he brought her kids into it.  I held to my word and did mail this lady.  Women united in anger...for the moment.

Don't get me wrong, I was crushed.  I had so much hope in ATM.  He was a good guy, we had so much in common and were great friends.  For a good while we really didn't talk at all.  But then slowly, we reestablished the friendship.  We started doing things together again but we were strictly friends and sex was off the table.  It was a clear understanding from me that should I find out that he has lied to me, or spinned information to be deceitful...I was done and out.  Of course, he was playing the games with my heart.  He was always talking about how he was making all of these positive changes in his life, how I would always have his heart, and it went on and on.

Well you know where this is flash...apparently I didn't ask the right questions.  I had once asked in passing if he was dating Pamela again.  She was one of the crazy girls back from my birthday.  Ha...I didn't ask the right question.  One fateful Friday night, I got an email from JDC, reading me the riot act for something I had given ATM.  So didn't see it coming but should have.

Wait for it....see ATM had started seeing JDC again and wanted a relationship with her.  I didn't ask so he didn't feel the need to tell me.  We weren't dating, remember?  Well when that shit didn't fly, he honestly told me that he was saying all the things he was to me because he thought I was....wait for it....


Yep, that is right folks.  He tried to spin it that he was lying and saying what he was saying because I was suicidal.  Nope.  Not suicidal but I might be homicidal.  Needless to say that was the final straw.  JDC was less than kind in some of her emails.  She even informed me that she would make sure I was "kicked to the curb".  You can't kick someone that is freely exiting the building.  You can be tomorrow's trash, I'm done.  I was just like look, you can have him.  If you want someone around your kids as a role model that cannot keep his dick in his pants...well have it and don't be surprised when you find out he lied to you yet again.

So, that was in June and well I can say that I have had no contact him with him since then.  He still has some small stuff of mine that apparently he is too immature to return.  But, I'd rather not have that scum in my life.  As my roommate says...he's a douchebag.

Now, if you are ever in the business of needing commercial loans in ATX area...please let me know and I am happy to share with you who ATM is and who you should NOT use.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

An Apple a Day...

Is not keeping the doctor away.

I think I am adjusting to life as a diabetic, pretty well.  Maybe as well as can be expected.  From a medical standpoint, my last check up reveals that I would considered someone that is pre-diabetic or has very well managed diabetes.  So, THAT is a WIN in my book.

I have come to find that like my Grammy and Momma Bear, I too suffer from the diabetic crash at night.  I was always waking up with headaches but my blood sugar numbers were higher than what they should be by morning.  Well, after doing a few tests in the middle of the night, I was finding that my numbers were really low and my body was automatically rebounding them.  So, to counter that, if I have not had a late dinner, I will have a cracker with peanut butter to tied me over to the morning.  So far it is working because waking up with a throbbing headache is NOT a good start to the day.

Outside of the middle of the night crashes, I really do keep it in check and have only had one recent blood sugar crash.  That happened while flying for my racecation in Seattle.  Going through two different time zones and leaving Austin before 6:30 am and arriving at 2:30 pm Seattle time...well I learned that a bagel with cream cheese and a piece of fruit will NOT keep my blood sugar stable for that long of a period of time.  Thankfully I had my Glucose tablets on me and Momma Bear was wiser than me and had traveled with peanuts, both of which saved the day.

I am still watching what I eat and making a slow gradual decline in the weight front.  With all the marathons this year, two 1/2 marathon's so far, I am seeing more inches versus weight go. So far, as of Tuesday, I am down 11.6 lbs, or 6%.   Definitely been a great feeling shopping in the closest.  Runner is also kind enough to point out those outfits that should be retired or never worn again unless they are going to a tailor first, which is never a bad thing to have happen.

But even with all the victories, the last six month check up was still a bust on the blood work and back to the doctor I went.  My overall cholesterol number is good, however, my LDL (good) cholesterol and triglycerides were NOT good.  From what I have learned, it is a complication that is common with Diabetes.  At least the cholesterol is.  But, I have an amazing doctor that thinks outside of the box (or at least I see it that way) and had another plan of attack than going on more medication to fix the cholesterol and triglycerides.

So with that, I have started the journey of the weight loss pill.  No, it is not the magic fix all pill that everyone wants.  This first 4 weeks, I am on a very low dose to see how I tolerate it and make sure that it does not leave me with the jitters.  So far, so good on that front.  I am still required to get my exercise in and journal my food.  So, if you are using MyFitnessPal or a Fitbit, hit me up.  I can always use extra motivation and encouragement.  I go back in for a follow up on September 30th. If all is well, then they will up my dosage and I will continue that for 6 months.

The overall goal of this is to try and spring the weight loss since I have stuck around 183 for awhile now.  Her belief is that as the weight goes, my cholesterol and triglycerides will follow suit.  If that does not happen, it will be time to add a few more pills to the mix.

So while an apple day is not keeping the doctor away, I am fairly healthy and trying to at least stay on top of that which is not healthy.

Monday, September 8, 2014

Same Song, 2nd Versus, A Little Bit Louder,

A Little Bit Worse....

Now that I have that song stuck in your're welcome.

For those that do not know it..."You can't ride my little red wagon, the axle's broken and the wheels are...."

Now the rest of you...YOU are welcome.

Yes as I have said once before, I fail even with the best laid plans.  I was going to blog more, swear...then life happened.  I know I have secret followers out there and I have failed you.  For that I am sorry.  So much has happened that I do not even know where to begin.

In the reality of my life, the phrase "You can't make this shit up" applies so much this year.

And with that teaser...I'll check in with you tomorrow.

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Great Power Involves Great Responsibility

They were words spoken by FDR.

They are words that I do not take lightly as I start on my new adventure.  Last night, I was elected the newest member of the Board of Directors of Brookfield Homeowners Association. 

They told me that no one ever wants to be on the 3 person board and I finally stood up as everyone just looked at each other.  I figured, why not?  It cannot be any worse than hosting a tournament of 50+ teams of crazy softball girls and parents for three days.  Or being on the board of directors for Lancaster Youth Softball Association (LYSA).

Of course, as luck would have it, two more people also ran.  One served on the board back when they were still building homes with the builders.  The other had been in the neighborhood since 2003.  Both also had more wisdom on their side in age.  I figured I was home free and no one would vote for me.  Heck...I even debated if I wanted to vote for myself or if I should vote for one of the others. I really felt I shouldn't vote for myself, like in the high school days were you couldn't nominate anyone off of your team.  But, I wanted at least one vote.

Ha!  As fate would have it, I was voted into office.  It was weird, I won.  Maybe if my college days had not been too crazy, maybe I could run for a public office.  Kidding, Kidding!

So, as of today, I have officially become a board member and had to vote to approve a landscape plan for a home owner that included a shed.  I suppose I should dig out those rules and read them.  Clearly I have not followed them as I just planted my plants where ever I saw fit that was both pleasing to the eye and maintained the drainage flow of the yard.

Let the good times begin.  It is a two year term with quarterly meetings and then more done by way of email.

May I always make the right decision.

As for training...after work tonight, it is a cross training day so it is a walk to Walgreen's to pick up my prescription.  A little shy of 3 miles tonight.

Monday, May 12, 2014


Reality is starting to set in and my panic button might be in full force.  In 34 days, I am suppose to be running 13.1 miles.  In 21 days, I will have needed to hit my fundraising goal.

Can I tell you that I am no where ready for either? 

I was at the disadvantage of being diagnosed with Bronchitis this spring.  It knocked me on my tail!  I have no idea how I ever managed to continue to play ball and go to class when I had it all the time in college.  Either this time was really bad or the ability to nap during the day during college was a godsend.  I refuse to believe that age plays a factor. 

The first 7 days of antibiotics and cough medicine did nothing for me, just put a dent in it.  So, when I hit day 14 of still not feeling well, I went back in to the see the doctor again.  This time it was continue the cough medicine, 7 days of steroids and an asthma inhaler.  It took another solid week and a half, but I FINALLY can breathe again.

Of course, during all that down time, I seriously slacked on fundraising AND training.  I committed to raising $3,600 by June 1.  If I don't hit that number...well it comes out of my pocket.  So, if you have NOT donated today...please do so!!!  It is a penny less than I have to come up with.  Already donated, ask your friends, give up a beer and donate again.  Isn't a cure for cancer worth a little sacrifice?

Training for 13.1 miles has also taken a major hit as well.  First it was 4 weeks of not being able to breathe and then struggling to walk around the building.  I can do that now...but some how not doing anything made my IT Band worse.  On Friday night, I had resorted to pain pills and not being able to step up into the trailer.  However, I refuse to let it stop me.  Stretching, rolling, ice, Epson Salt baths...I WILL run this race darn it.
So, I am begging you to help.  I am not giving up on me with the fundraising. 
I am Refusing to motto I see daily!
  I need your help today!

Thursday, March 13, 2014


Yes, yes I am discovering that it is really a thing.  A great thing.  It's doing a race and making it a vacation.

My race in Seattle will be just that, a RaceCation with my Aunt & Momma Bear.  We will fly to Seattle pre-race and then head to Portland post race and fly home from there.  It's becoming a VERY real thing in that I bought my airline ticket yesterday.  Yay!

Of course, the RaceCation took on a whole new life this week.  One of the gals that I am training with mentioned a 1/2 Marathon Race in the Bahama's in January 2015.  Ummm, why wouldn't a person do this?  Well my mom saw the post and she of course was telling people I was going to do it.  So, to make sure I didn't disappoint Momma Bear, I am officially registered for a race in the Bahama's in January 2015. 

So, apparently my training will need to continue for the next year.

Training is going well.  I am battling soreness in my IT band and my calf right now.  I have been seeing Dr. Seth Wagenblast and he has been a godsend.  For the most part, the IT pain is gone and now the calf tightness has crept up because the other muscles have all relaxed.  If you are in the Austin area and need help for any type of exercise induced pain, I recommend going to see him.  He offers free roll out clinics and even free evaluations.  You can find him by clicking here!

Monday's and Wednesday's I am back to do boot camp at 5:30 am.  I so hate the early mornings but my body sure likes the results.  The muscles definitely remind me that they were not worked this way just by running.  Of course, those days I also have to walk the pups in the evening.  If you know Finnegan...this is a necessary evil.  (He still hasn't slowed down at 5.)

Tuesday's we have what is called "Hill" practice.  AKA, they find some of the worst hills in Austin and decide we should run those routes.  Well this week we graduated to the really bad hills and will stay there for the rest of the season.  They start us with Loops 1 & 3 through a neighborhood.  Apparently once we become a little more conditioned, we can do Loop2 as well.  I'll have to post a picture because these are crazy insane hills.

Thursday we have track practice.  Yes, it really is on a track. We do different things each week that will help improve our cardio, improve race speed and includes focus on right techniques.  They also like to throw in a lot of core exercises after practice too.  (I HATE planks, that is all!)

Friday, well this is REST DAY.  Well rest in that I just walk the pups on a short walk.  That is a daily affair in addition to the training schedule.

Last Saturday we did 8 miles in this cold mist/drizzle/rain.  About a mile in the mist became more of a heavy drizzle/rain.  My thoughts were turn around.  But, there is still a chance it could rain in Seattle so we stuck it out.  There was some pretty good hills on the route this week. 

And that is the training that preps me for RaceCations!

Monday, February 24, 2014

She's Gone Mad Part II

Yes, it is true.  After months of not posting, I have officially gone cray, cray.  In other words, crazy.  

Even though my doctor told me I would never be able to run again, I still didn't want to believe it.  I was not ready to give up on my hobby of softball or just running for exercise.  In September, I started working with Team and Training on the leadership team.

For those of you who do not know what Team in Training is, they are a nonprofit organization that raises money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma society, or should I say their participants do.  Individuals sign up with Team in Training.  The participants agree to raise a set dollar amount and in turn, they are trained to do an endurance event.  It can be a marathon, a hike through the Grand Canyon, a Triathlon or a 100 mile Bike Ride.  If you have thought about doing some event like this and were afraid, this is the group to do it with as they will train you, teach you what to eat, help you stay healthy and provide your training schedule while you raise a few dollars.  

Team In Training is a group that increases awareness of the work of The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and raises money towards finding cures for leukemia, lymphoma, Hodgkin’s disease, and myeloma.  Participants train for nationally recognized marathons, century rides, or triathlons in the name of all patients, including my Honored Hero.

Leukemia is the number one disease-killer of children under 15, and lymphoma is the leading killer of men and women under 35.  Every five minutes, someone in the United States learns that they have leukemia, lymphoma or myeloma.

This past winter, I served as the Mission Captain for the Winter Season.  My job was simple, for each Saturday practice, I found a person to share their Mission with the team, why they are part of Team in Training.  As you can imagine, there are definitely stories of victory and stories of heartbreak.  Our overall goal is to find a cure so we can celebrate more victories than heartbreaks!

Well during the Winter Seasons Injury Prevention Clinic, I got a second opinion on my knee (free of charge- YAY).  In looking at my knee, the doctor said there was no way that I needed a knee replacement and my ACL was fine.  Then he grabbed my leg in a certain manner, and I never knew a person could fly off a table so high, but I sure did.  His finding, it was my IT band.  For those of you that do not know what that is, you can click here to learn more. My IT band had attached itself to quadricep and was no longer gliding over it.  Hence why my knee hurt every time I ran and why my hip always ached.  

Well after a solid month of exercises and continued walking, the problem eased and I found that I did not need my knee brace anymore.  I then began running again.  Yes, running that thing I wasn't suppose to do.  By January, I was able to run for a 1 minute, walk for 3 minutes and finish my 13.1 miles.  It might not have been fast but I was doing something I was told I could not do anymore and I finished a 1/2 marathon without ending up in a walking boot!!  Whoooohoooo!!!!!

And so the running fever has returned.  I decided that this season it was time again to be just a participate and raise money on my own for a very important cause.   So the “She’s Gone Mad Part II” Campaign has officially began!

My commitment to you between now and June is to blog on a weekly, if not daily basis and share all the  training and juggling of life that goes on while taking on this endurance event.  It's not easy but it is so worth it.  Tonight I have spent a 1/2 hour so far just updating my letters I need to send out, updating my fundraising website and updating you here.  I still have envelopes to stuff and address so it will be a busy evening.  Of course, let's not forget, today is a cross training day so I need to get in a 1/2 hour walk with the pups yet tonight.

You can follow my fundraising efforts here:

In the spirit of Team in Training, I sign of tonight with:

GO TEAM!!!!!