Thursday, April 28, 2011

Day 2: Where you'd like to be in 10 years

This question reminds me of the standard question that comes in interviews, the one that they fish for the perfect answer of, still working for this company.  LOL

I honestly don't have a true answer, it can't be answered.  That said, I know of  things that I want to accomplish in life, but will they happen in the next ten years? I don't know.  But what I do know is that things happen, life happens in its own time, when the time is right and when it should, they will happen. 

Look at the past five years of my life.  Heck, if you asked me 5 years ago where I would be today - I assure you that living in Texas would not of even been in my vocabulary.  5 years ago I was at the same company for 7 years, had my own softball club with 5 teams, was a Varsity High School coach, had a great core group of friends, was dating a guy I felt was a great guy, I appeared to have it all.  But life happens.  Under the umbrella of Love, I moved with the  Ex to Texas, moved three times, found a job I liked, SURVIVED and exited a relationship that was very abusive, made & continue to make great friends and bought a house. 

So, with that said, some of the things that I want to see happen in my life are (in no particular order):
1.  Find the one, get married
2.  Have a family.  If I end up solo, I will seriously consider foster/adoption around 40.
3.  Be debt free!! (Hopefully outside of school loans & my house, this will happens in the next two years!)
4.  Work just one job! (Again - 2 years worst case scenario!)

With all that said, I live life to the fulliest and realize that today is a gift from God.  He works his magic in his own time and while his time line doesn't always match up with my time line, I know that with Patience and Prayer, things do work out in the end in the way that is best for me!

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Day 1 - Your Current Relationship

Day 1 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

Dear God, why would this question be the first one?  I loathe the single life.  There, I said it.  I hate every moment of it.  It never use to bother me.  Maybe it is the biological clock factor?  Maybe it is the fact that almost all my friends are married and/or have kids and I have none of the above.

I don't know why it bothers me so much.  For so much of my life I was free, independent and loving life just the way it was.  Then, there was the EX.  Now, we know at the end of the day, that relationship was 0% healthy for me and no way it was going to work.  But, there were good days and for a good period there was more good than there was bad.  It was the first very serious relationship I had and the first guy that I ever lived with.  There were so many things that just were during those good times that I miss.

Having someone to go home to.  That best friend you can tell anything to that is there just for you.  That person that just knows when you need a hug and you don't even need to ask for it.  Someone to cook for and share dinner with.  Someone that checks in with you every day just to wanting to know how your day is.
Being single, all of those things are missing.  Today, or at least the last five guys I have dated or have shown interest in are concerned with one thing....SEX.  They don't want a relationship, they just want no strings attached, booty call sex.  I just hope that after waiting all of these years, the chance at finding the one hasn't slipped through and the time has passed.

A Fun Challenge

So my faithful friend Runner started this challenge on her blog and since I never finished the last one, I thought why not.  It definitely is a lot different than the other one I started and I think makes one dig a little deeper than the other one did, it definitely leaves me vulnerable!

The plan is to stop back later today with Day 1. 

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Just what the doctor ordered....

Some much needed R&R.  I gave myself a mini-vacation, wasn't necessarily a "stay" vacation, but it was a nice one in which I didn't leave to travel back to Nebraska which is how 90% of the vacations go.

So, the stay vacation started Wednesday night.  I was granted an early leave at 10 pm from Lowe's.  Okay - it was a 1/2 hour early - but yeah! me!

Thursday was actually an exhausting day.  I met my friend Skinny-Biotch at the gym.  Yes, I said the nasty three letter word - GYM.  I haven't blogged about Skinny-Biotch before but she is a partner in crime at Lowe's.  Actually reminds me of myself in that she is early 30s, just bought her first house, and is holding her own in life without help!  Of course, I call her the Biotch  only because I was so afraid of her when she first came to our store, she seemed so mean.  :)  But now she is helping my inner skinny-bitch come out and making me be accountable at the gym.

After the gym workout and tour, I headed home for a quick shower.  I was suppose to meet Vanilla Horndog for lunch just to catch up.  It is funny because he was one of the guys that I posted back in my "Being" post.  He knows that unless his life changes, he and I will be friends and nothing more until he has time to date.  That said, he was on the north side of town this week for work and contacted me about meeting up just to catch up.  Needless to say that he got caught on a Sales Call and lunch was not to be had.  Of course, that is how things roll with Vanilla Horndog.  The rest of the day, was doing errands, oil change for the car, hair cut, dentist and finally hit the road for Houston at 8 pm to visit Big Country.

Friday, the most important and only agenda for the day....Da Beach!  Big Country & family, myself and some friends of theirs loaded up the vehicles and headed to Galvaston for the day.  Even Finnegus was invited to come!  A relaxing day was had playing in the surf, enjoying the sun and of course, nothing says beach like Captain Morgan. 

Saturday, as they say plans change and when they change to your favor, whose going to complain?  Not I.  We ended up spending the day chilling at Big Country's house, sitting poolside and enjoying some fine beverages.  In the pm, well it isn't a trip without Big Country whipping up something special and special it was.  Don't get me wrong, the ribs were delicious....but that mushroom puff, yummmy for my tummy!

Sunday, well it was Easter Sunday and church was on the agenda.  Rather than being different and finding a Catholic Church to go to, I opted to go to Church with Big Country, his family, my aunt and another cousin.  I am not sure what affiliation the church was, but when you grew up a structured Catholic, wow different is all that comes to mind.  I can see how it works for them but at the same time, I think I enjoy my structure.  The afternoon was spent with Easter Egg hunts and relaxing!  Unfortunately it also meant the end of my stay and it was time for Finnegus' and I to head back home.

Monday was my final partial vacation day!  I headed to the gym at 8, made the most of the day with a nap, some yard work and cleaning all before I headed into Lowe's at 5:30 to return to the normal grind.  However, what this vacation showed me was how much I need and want to be focused so Lowe's goes away!  I forgot what lawn mowers in a neighborhood sounded like on a Saturday morning because I am never great will that be!?!?

Ahhh, yes I am also going to steal from Runner her 30 days of blogging look out for that!

Thursday, April 14, 2011

They Just Don't Get It!

Warning - today is a rant day. 

Some days I really get why some of the mangers we have at my part time job went into retail and skipped college, they just don't get it.  I just want to tell them, walk two weeks and my shoes and then let's talk.  Of course, they will have some whitty answer and then will forget we had that conversation.

On a weekly basis, it is a fight to make sure they don't give me more than 20 hours in a week.  For budget purposes, I need to average 13 as things are set right now.  But, most weeks I have to remind them that I have more than 20 and I don't want that.  21 hours, 24 hours isn't bad for the average person.  That said, they forget I already work 40 hours if not more at the full time job.  I don't need a few extra hours at the part time job.

So Monday night was a classic.  There were four closing cashiers.  I was the only one that works there part-time and has another full time job.  The others have it as their only job.  When day light savings time started, Lowe's started opening at 6 am and staying open until 10 pm.  In reality it is dumb because they don't change the door signs and most customers don't know unless they happen to stop by.  For the worker bees, it means that most nights we don't get to go home until 10:30 or later.  However, there are always a few that are scheduled to be off at 10.  On Monday, when two of the 3 asked if they could leave because they were only scheduled until 10, the manager (who does schedules) asks they Head Casher (who also does the schedules) why is Jenn scheduled until 10:30 and not one of the first to leave.  EXCELLENT question smithers.

Then came last nights conversation.  I originally was scheduled vacation from Sunday through Easter because I was going to Vegas and just wanted off for Easter.  Anyway, since Vegas was cancelled, I told the manager that she could add back in my Monday & Wednesday night shifts.  Well, some how that also turned into adding my Sunday shift back in too.  Our mystery shop for the month was not good and it was because the cashiers failed that day so now we have a mandatory meeting on Sunday.  Last night I told the manager that I would either come in to work the five hour shift or come in for the meeting, not both, her choice.  She then proceeds to tell me how it is her day off too and she has to come in, blah, blah, blah.  Lady I don't give a rats ass if you are in a different country and have to come back is really what I wanted to say.  I'll remind them Sunday when I leave I am not coming back and if they write me up, I don't care.  There is a first for everything I suppose.

I am so tired of this battle with them!  Things are finally starting to roll, slowly, with Scentsy so maybe I can build up steam there and tell Lowe's where to go.  I am making an effort to make it go which I haven't done in the past and it is amazing the difference it makes.  Anyone interested in being an Independent Consultation for Scentsy?  It is great extra income and pretty easy!  Cheap start up costs too!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011


Meet my new super hero, the Dixie DeBT eLiMiNaTOR.  (I'll just call her Dixie for short!) She is a mean, lean fighting machine that beats debt into submission.

So in reality she doesn't exist.  I received a link yesterday that allows you to create your own superhero.  So, when I saw that one of the chest logos was a $, I just tweaked it to the $ necklace used to battle the evil, evil debt and credit companies. 

Since my departure from the EX, debt has been a thorn in my side.  Some days I really wonder how I managed to buy a house.  Some days I wonder if I really should of bought the house.  Prior to getting the house, I was making serious strides beating things down.  Well, then the recession hit and my focus moved more towards my house.  While I didn't take on any more debt, I started turtling on the debt and then the credit card companies became evil and made life more difficult for me.  I mean, how will you ever win a race when they feel you should pay 29.99% interest on a balance.  You are freakin kidding me was heard from me a LOT.

Only a select few know how bad the situation really is.  I am so grateful that Runner gets it and I can share the struggles of money.  (She and her husband are also banishing their debt and trying to build their financial future too.)  Honestly, I see the debt is my biggest failure.  Yes, at the end of the day, a LOT of it stemmed from my time with the EX but I wasn't free and clear before I met him either, so I can't blame him entirely.  Even though I was an accounting major, managing money was my biggest flaw!  I always wanted what I couldn't afford and would buy it anyway.  Look at my baby Explorer (that I still miss today!).  It was an impusle buy that ended up with a 600+ car payment.  I mean, who does that?!?!  At the end, I owned it free and clear and maybe that was why I was so sad to see it go!  However, it defined my poor choices of money!

But, what has been done is done and I can't change it.  What I can change is my future and I am doing that baby step by baby step every day for a healthy financial future!  Hopefully I can pass along some of the wisdom that I have learned along the way and who knows - if I dig out of this mess - I might even be able to write a book.  Hahaha.  Of course, I couldn't do any of this without my friends on the WIR site!  They keep me focused and while I was away most of the year, this year has reinforced what a positive effect they have in my life and how much progress I can make when I apply myself and keep posting on their site.  If you have never heard of WIR and have debt of any kind, I suggest you head over if you need motivation to be free and clear of the chains that bind called debt.

Every day is a learning experience of choices that are made that define my financial future and I learn from them.  If you don't know where to begin, the first step is a budget!  I think Dave Ramsey said it best when he said "Spend your money on paper before it comes in for the month versus wondering where it all went at the end of the month." 

I have been consistent with my budget this year and making it the decision maker of how I spend my money.  Of course that reasoning was why my Vegas trip was cancelled but in the end, I will be more grateful!  So far, through March, I have kicked 4.4% of my debt to the curb and hope that things will begin to snowball in the next few months!  I have to rebuild my emergency fund back up after Finn wiped it out, but things will start rolling. 

So, if you ask me to do something and I say no, or suggest something else in place of it, please know it is not anything personal, it is just my alter ego Dixie DeBT eLiMiNaTOR reminding me who is in charge.  Take for example the grass.  Rather than putting some much needed sod down in my backyard, I think that $200 will be better spent obtaining my next credit card $0!  The sixth zero of this journey is so, so close!

Friday, April 8, 2011


At the end of the day, I believe in my faith and don't give much stock to what the stars say about how my life is going to be.  That said....I think today's forecast was so fitting, almost scary like.

"Give your life meaning today by truly feeling the beauty in every moment you live.  There is no need to beat yourself up about the past, so move on.  It also does no good to beat yourself up about the present.  You are at the right place at the right time, so don't waste your energy by thinking you should be somewhere else.  There is plenty of fun and adventure to be had right where you are."

Last night I talked with Momma and realized how suddenly at Peace I am with just Being!  It is crazy.  Of course, it has been a crazy week of changes too but I have no regrets which is what is important.  Then again, maybe it is the things that are finally starting to go my way. 

Please forgive me Momma, but there were a couple of guys out there that I could term FWB (friends with benefits).  But in my moment of Being this week, they were told that unless they were at the point of having time to date and be in a real relationship, the benefits was done.  I don't blame them, I allowed myself to be put in that position but I don't want to be that girl anymore.  I don't want to be the one that scratches their itch.  As for the dating thing, that will still be on the break unless Mr. Right pulls a miracle and finds me.  I told a friend last night that I just think that I am so caught up with the biological clock ticking, never having kids that I sabotage what chance any relationship could have.

I also began the purging of clutter last night.  We now have posted a desk, comforter and TV for sale.  Still have a number of things that I can add to the list this weekend.  Plus on another positive note, I have had three leads for Scentsy clients in the past 24 hours.  Of which, all should be placing an order!  Whoohooo…maybe that will start taking off and I can get rid of Lowe’s sooner than later!

On a main job front, things are starting to turn for the positive too.  Or at least there is something positive to look in the future to.  In a nutshell, the part of my job that I absolutely LOVED is being pushed towards the front again.  How quickly that will happen, well our New York office will have a say on that, but it is out there and they want me!

Who knew that just Being could bring so much peace.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

A break

I think that is what I need, a break.

A break from the dating world at least. I don't know if it is possible to try too hard to find the right guy that you end up wrecking the chances with new prospects? It sure feels like it. Then again, they probably weren't right for me anyway - but you know how that goes. So, I am taking a break. Unless Mr. Right appears on my door step, I am taking a break.

A break from dieting. I swear I have been in the up, down, up, down, up, down roller coaster called weight loss for months, maybe years. At the end of the day, I do really good for a few days and then fail miserably for a few more days and so on. So, instead of diet, instead of journaling, instead of a million versions of diet - I am going to just go with BEING. I'll eat what I want when I am hungry. I will listen to my body and just focus on taking care of me. Feeding myself with fuel and things that will energize me. Of course, working out will also be included in this adventure. Biking, running, just enjoying it outside.

A break from cable. I know, scary! But, I cancelled my cable on Tuesday. Oddly enough, I haven't been home to even notice that it is off. I think I was home for a half hour last night that I watched part of a replay of the Young & the Restless on CBS site but otherwise, I haven't missed it. Something tells me that tonight and tomorrow will not be much different. My Thursday night softball league starts tonight so it will probably be close to 9 before I am home, have the dogs walked, had supper and showered. Friday night will probably be much the same. Plus, it is the season of Crab Grass in my backyard which means I will be spending a lot of time in the backyard pulling out that darn crap and trying to get ahead of it since weed killer only seems to slow it down a little.

What I won't get a break from is work. :( Lowe's is tiring right now. We are staying open until 10 at night which means it is usually 10:30 before I leave and then I can never go home and go straight to bed. But, after they tried to pull a fast one and schedule me with 8 hour shifts on Saturday & Sunday, on top of my 10 hours during the week, HR told management they couldn't do it since I wasn't available. :) Win for me!!!  The other job, the real job, well it is just busy and we are waiting to see what our raises are going to be for the year, if anything.  Fingers crossed it is something!

Finnegan update - well I think he might of exhausted a few lives but it doesn't seemed to have slowed him down at all. Finn is back to himself, crazy as ever and is showing no effects from the Heat Stroke. The vet was certain he would have permanent brain damage, so I am very relieved! Unfortunately for him, it means that he has been contained to the back porch on nights that I work. I put the baby gate up so he can't leave the porch and run himself into heat stroke again.