Monday, September 22, 2014

You just can't make this shit up...

Seriously, when it comes to my dating life...you really have to stop and ponder, how does this shit happen.

Well, it does start with crappy taste in men.  Clearly that is the historical pattern.  Yes there have been some good ones, but the serious ones are crappy.  However, the VERY good news on this front is that the choices are getting better.  The last is never quite as craptacular as the one before.  So let's celebrate that moment.

As for the rest...buckle up because this is an 18 month tale you will say...you can't make this shit up...by the end.

So we know that historically, the EX was the worst of the worst.  Ultimate fail.  Then there was NODIY.  While he might of won in the category of not physically abusive to me, there was the emotional abuse as well as just the slob factor.  Then came along ATM man shortly after NODIY finally packed up his junk and got out.  It was a victory with no physical or emotional abuse...but he had this other issue.

Oh the hope for ATM was there.  We had so many things in common.  Both single, never married, no kids.  He played professional baseball for awhile, enjoyed golf, had a good career, his own place and seemed like an overall decent guy.  But, we know as I go...they can never be normal and if they seem too good, it definitely is too good to be true.

Things started going downhill with ATM in the fall of last year.  He was always "too busy" with work to do anything.  According to him he had events, and all these other things going on with work that he didn't have time to date or do anything.  We would still do things, it was just few and far between.  We agreed that we were "dating" but we were not committed to each other and were allowed to date other people.

Being at the point that I was over men, I was okay with it.  It was what it was.  On the night of my birthday, I got a text from some random chick claiming that she was dating him and that there were others, blah, blah blah.  The ironic factor on it was that we were actually out to dinner for my birthday when I got it.  Obviously he and I had a talk about it and really didn't think too much of it.  We were dating, we were free to go out with other people.  I had gone out on random dates here or there in my quest to find the right guy but nothing had panned out.  Apparently the other chicks in this email distribution were not under the same understanding and the catfights were classic.  It was actually comical to sit back and watch it unfold because I knew where I stood with ATM and clearly they had zero idea.  Obviously it started to give me insight into who he really was.

Then came March and ATM attended the Round Rock Express game (our Triple A team) with me.  It was a work function in which we had Suite tickets and a lot of the execs from work were there.  Of course, he did what he does best and used it as a networking function.  Well, during the course of the game, I happen to see one of his text messages he received that said "I love you and appreciate you."  Instinct took over and I knew that was more than someone he was just "dating".  Of course, I was 700 hundred shades of pissed off but really couldn't deal with it in the moment as we were surrounded by work people.  Last thing I needed was them involved in is my stupid dating drama.

Well, according to HIM, she was someone through work that passed loans his way, etc.  He tried to explain that she was married, had two kids, her husband was in the legislature, how he didn't like they way they talked to each other, blah, blah, blah.  Of course, I am not an IDIOT and I was not born yesterday and your lies do not fool me.  Let's just say he was in a tailspin by the next morning when I informed him that they WERE married and he forgot to mention the divorce they got in 2007.  Apparently the fool didn't realize that people in the legislature have public records.  Because I am also very crafty in my research, I was able to track her down.    In his mind, he was dating her (AKA JDC) and was in love with her, never mind he was in my bed the day before.  Seriously, you are a jack ass.   I gave him through the weekend (it was a Thursday) to come clean with her.  I informed him that I was going to follow up with her too ensure he told the truth.  It's one thing to deal with this shit, it is another to know he brought her kids into it.  I held to my word and did mail this lady.  Women united in anger...for the moment.

Don't get me wrong, I was crushed.  I had so much hope in ATM.  He was a good guy, we had so much in common and were great friends.  For a good while we really didn't talk at all.  But then slowly, we reestablished the friendship.  We started doing things together again but we were strictly friends and sex was off the table.  It was a clear understanding from me that should I find out that he has lied to me, or spinned information to be deceitful...I was done and out.  Of course, he was playing the games with my heart.  He was always talking about how he was making all of these positive changes in his life, how I would always have his heart, and it went on and on.

Well you know where this is going....news flash...apparently I didn't ask the right questions.  I had once asked in passing if he was dating Pamela again.  She was one of the crazy girls back from my birthday.  Ha...I didn't ask the right question.  One fateful Friday night, I got an email from JDC, reading me the riot act for something I had given ATM.  So didn't see it coming but should have.

Wait for it....see ATM had started seeing JDC again and wanted a relationship with her.  I didn't ask so he didn't feel the need to tell me.  We weren't dating, remember?  Well when that shit didn't fly, he honestly told me that he was saying all the things he was to me because he thought I was....wait for it....


SUICIDAL


Yep, that is right folks.  He tried to spin it that he was lying and saying what he was saying because I was suicidal.  Nope.  Not suicidal but I might be homicidal.  Needless to say that was the final straw.  JDC was less than kind in some of her emails.  She even informed me that she would make sure I was "kicked to the curb".  You can't kick someone that is freely exiting the building.  You can be tomorrow's trash, I'm done.  I was just like look, you can have him.  If you want someone around your kids as a role model that cannot keep his dick in his pants...well have it and don't be surprised when you find out he lied to you yet again.

So, that was in June and well I can say that I have had no contact him with him since then.  He still has some small stuff of mine that apparently he is too immature to return.  But, I'd rather not have that scum in my life.  As my roommate says...he's a douchebag.

Now, if you are ever in the business of needing commercial loans in ATX area...please let me know and I am happy to share with you who ATM is and who you should NOT use.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

An Apple a Day...

Is not keeping the doctor away.

I think I am adjusting to life as a diabetic, pretty well.  Maybe as well as can be expected.  From a medical standpoint, my last check up reveals that I would considered someone that is pre-diabetic or has very well managed diabetes.  So, THAT is a WIN in my book.

I have come to find that like my Grammy and Momma Bear, I too suffer from the diabetic crash at night.  I was always waking up with headaches but my blood sugar numbers were higher than what they should be by morning.  Well, after doing a few tests in the middle of the night, I was finding that my numbers were really low and my body was automatically rebounding them.  So, to counter that, if I have not had a late dinner, I will have a cracker with peanut butter to tied me over to the morning.  So far it is working because waking up with a throbbing headache is NOT a good start to the day.

Outside of the middle of the night crashes, I really do keep it in check and have only had one recent blood sugar crash.  That happened while flying for my racecation in Seattle.  Going through two different time zones and leaving Austin before 6:30 am and arriving at 2:30 pm Seattle time...well I learned that a bagel with cream cheese and a piece of fruit will NOT keep my blood sugar stable for that long of a period of time.  Thankfully I had my Glucose tablets on me and Momma Bear was wiser than me and had traveled with peanuts, both of which saved the day.

I am still watching what I eat and making a slow gradual decline in the weight front.  With all the marathons this year, two 1/2 marathon's so far, I am seeing more inches versus weight go. So far, as of Tuesday, I am down 11.6 lbs, or 6%.   Definitely been a great feeling shopping in the closest.  Runner is also kind enough to point out those outfits that should be retired or never worn again unless they are going to a tailor first, which is never a bad thing to have happen.

But even with all the victories, the last six month check up was still a bust on the blood work and back to the doctor I went.  My overall cholesterol number is good, however, my LDL (good) cholesterol and triglycerides were NOT good.  From what I have learned, it is a complication that is common with Diabetes.  At least the cholesterol is.  But, I have an amazing doctor that thinks outside of the box (or at least I see it that way) and had another plan of attack than going on more medication to fix the cholesterol and triglycerides.

So with that, I have started the journey of the weight loss pill.  No, it is not the magic fix all pill that everyone wants.  This first 4 weeks, I am on a very low dose to see how I tolerate it and make sure that it does not leave me with the jitters.  So far, so good on that front.  I am still required to get my exercise in and journal my food.  So, if you are using MyFitnessPal or a Fitbit, hit me up.  I can always use extra motivation and encouragement.  I go back in for a follow up on September 30th. If all is well, then they will up my dosage and I will continue that for 6 months.

The overall goal of this is to try and spring the weight loss since I have stuck around 183 for awhile now.  Her belief is that as the weight goes, my cholesterol and triglycerides will follow suit.  If that does not happen, it will be time to add a few more pills to the mix.

So while an apple day is not keeping the doctor away, I am fairly healthy and trying to at least stay on top of that which is not healthy.

Monday, September 8, 2014

Same Song, 2nd Versus, A Little Bit Louder,

A Little Bit Worse....

Now that I have that song stuck in your head...you're welcome.

For those that do not know it..."You can't ride my little red wagon, the axle's broken and the wheels are...."

Now the rest of you...YOU are welcome.

Yes as I have said once before, I fail even with the best laid plans.  I was going to blog more, swear...then life happened.  I know I have secret followers out there and I have failed you.  For that I am sorry.  So much has happened that I do not even know where to begin.

In the reality of my life, the phrase "You can't make this shit up" applies so much this year.

And with that teaser...I'll check in with you tomorrow.