Seasons...

You know I always get those emails that talk about friends come and go in seasons. I never thought much of it because my friends have always been there if I have needed them and we have always done the best to stay in touch and be there for each other.

However, I finally learned that there is probably some truth to it. I am hurt, frustrated and don't get it but at the end of the day, it is what it is, and it just isn't a call I will make the next trip home.

See, BALLER and I have been friends since I got out of college. We lived together for a few years, played ball together, etc. She moved a lot for her job and I was always the friend that went on road trips to see her, to IL, to TX, I even took off work and helped her move to IL when her family didn't.

But, as the seasons go, the friendship changed and really don't know if I can say she is a friend anymore. I invited her to my mom's party, I called her on my way back to town and what did I get from it - NOTHING. God forbid if BALLER would miss a weekly event to see a friend in town. God forbid if BALLER couldn't come and see me after her softball game instead of inviting everyone over to her house after the ball game.

I just think of all the efforts I have made over the past to keep the friendship there, the family functions I went to, how I cleared things so I could see her when she was back and town and basically, she couldn't fit me into HER schedule when I was back. It hurts, it sucks, and the best is she put it on me, that I didn't call, that I was busy with family, blah blah blah. Of course, it also makes sense why she has never come to see me in TX either.

There are seasons for friends.

A Surprise Party, an Aunt, and a Funeral

Wow what a journey, a road trip that the planning started last year in August. Mom was turning 55. A surprise party it was. She didn't know I was coming back to Nebraska, she didn't know her sister and brother in law were coming back to Nebraska, and she didn't know we had a GIANT surprise party planned for her. The invitations were sent with strict orders....it was a surprise. Dad intercepted the mail with ease and she didn't realize that cards might be coming in the mail for her.

With the plan laid out, I began my journey back to Nebraska via car on Wednesday evening. The plan was to make it to OKC and stay the night there. Well, crinkle number one in the plan was that there is not any hotels on the north side of OKC. Once I did find one and went in, I was told my dogs were too big, pound sand. So, FINALLY around midnight, I found a place to lodge with the two pups. Since it was late and I had already talked to my brother & dad earlier in the night, I shut the ringer off and attempted to get some shut eye.

Well, I had to get up with the beasts at 5 because they need some bathroom time. I finally got up before 9 and already had a message from dad...but something in his voice was VERY different than the night before. It wasn't my imagination. They say God works in mysterious ways or maybe it was Grandma just waiting for all her Grand kids to be home, but God made the call and Grandma Schmidt went to join Grandpa, Roy and Brennan in Heaven.

After discussions with the family, it was decided that the surprise party would go on. DC was helpful in giving me airfare prices since my mom was demanding that we start looking at flights. I had to hurry to my parents house and check the mail since my dad was in Columbus helping with the funeral plans. I wish I would of video taped my mom walking in the door. The dogs greeted her and she kept saying "What are you two doing here" and the look on her face was priceless. The tears came with the "Happy Birthday."

Fast forward to later in the night when her sister and brother in law came around the back of the house and said Happy Birthday. It was the best birthday ever for her. I was able to cover Friday morning saying I was going to see friends and lunch with old co-workers so Trav & I could shop for food and prepare everything. We managed to get her out of the house and back for the Surprise without her every knowing.

The party didn't go as late as it probably would of since most of the family headed home early to prepare for Grandma's funeral. By the time dishes were done, it seemed like almost all were gone. But, my nephew was still there. Yep - I'm an aunt and can officially say it. Shane is a dad, a little boy, Gage Francis born on April 17th. He is a doll and I continue my speciality of putting the babies to sleep.

My trip was extended a day so I could make Grandma Schmidt's funeral. However, I think Grandma deserves her own post and I'll have to do that tomorrow. In the meantime, I need to get some zzzzzz's like the pups did all day!

The Journey

It has been a journey like no other. It is a journey that three years ago I never thought I would of gone through and could of never imagined getting to...but I did and I can officially say, I did it!

The journey began 2 years, 1 month, and 22 days ago. At that point I would never tell you I would be where I am today. I packed up all I had and moved to this state with the love of my life, the EX. In a short period of time, it started to go terribly wrong, his alcohol addiction one out and I saw life flash before me. No matter how hard a person tries, there are some addictions you can win and other's you can't. Accepting that you can't change someone, letting go of them and freeing yourself from the abuse is harder than I hope you ever have to know, especially in a state where your support group is limited. But, I did. That was 1 year, 2 months and 13 days that I faced the last fist.

Yesterday I celebrated a new me and the person I really am. I finished my first Triathlon in 2 hours and 17 minutes. I did it despite a chronic sinus infection since December and two doctor's recommending surgery. I did it despite working two jobs to help dig out of what was left behind by the EX. I did it because I wanted it!

It has been a journey. Some days were good, some days were bad and some days were unthinkable but I am exactly where I want to be in life. I know that I have some things left on my to do list, marriage, kids, and a few smaller ones. But, those will come when they are right. I won this victory because I believed in myself and the other's will come when the time is right. But for now - I relish in the victory!

Of course, now it is on to losing that weight I gained in the last 1 year, 2 months, and 13 days....DAMN comfort food. But - I will and I will do it as I train for my next Triathlon - going to give the Austin Triathlon a whirl as a slimmer me. Look out world - here I come!

T Minus 1

Gosh...I can't believe RACE day is here already. Tomorrow at this time, I will be celebrating the fact that I finished. It is weird because I have never done anything like this before. In softball, you practice, you play games, you practice, you play some more. Here, it is ALL practice until RACE day. You have no way to gage if you are ready, you just have to go out there and do it. I think that is what scares me the most, AM I READY?

DC arrived on Friday afternoon and has been soaking up the city. I took her out to The Oasis Friday night. Nothing like a margarita, a beautiful sunset and good food to relax a person! Yesterday was a rest day for me so the plan was to head to SA (San Antonio) for the day. But first, I opted to head back to the fat people's club first, more on that in a later post.

DC is a history buff, so definitely seeing the Alamo was on the to do list. Of course, it WAS suppose to be a warm day and sunshine with a 20% chance of rain. But weather forcasting is the only job you can be wrong. So, with our luck, the sky's opened and it start pouring rain. Needless to say - we did what tourists do, they buy the $1.95 rain poncho from the Alamo gift shop and keep on moving. We walked the river walk, toured the tourist shops, had embarrassing moments buying shirts for my brother and did all that we could do. We opted for an appetizer and margaritas along the river walk. (I know - great race day preparation!!)

About 7, we decided we had enough and headed to the Salt Lick for dinner. I really wish I could hear the stories DC tells people of this place. Let's just say, it is Texas in it's finest. For non-locals, you have off duty, plain clothes officers directing the parking flow with their pistols. Once we park and head to the front, I point out to DC we are not having the complete experience. See, no liquor license at the restaurant means you bring your own! So - she saw all the coolers, those on wheels, those still in the case, you have everything. Then there was the menu, you have your choice of BBQ meat, meat or meat. No choice on sides. But it is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO good. Like I said, I think she liked the food, just wish I could hear the stories she tells about the visit.

Well, I better go. Time to head downtown to pick up my race day packet and check in my bike....more later.

GEORGE

I probably should put in a disclaimer her that if you are a guy - you might skip this one.

I hate him. I really, really hate him some days. He is like a cruel joke that god plays on women. Some people refer to him as TOM - Time of Month. I don't know why I started calling him George. He always comes every month and some month he drops way too much luggage.

Now I am getting ready to do a triathlon in 6 days. I am not ready. I do not feel like I am in shape to be ready. I am already psycholigically psyching myself out of this race. I do not need George to visit NOW. Why can't he wait? Why can't this be a month where I skip it? Why NOW? Yes - he is starting to rear his ugly head. I am TIRED. I am cranky. I have cramps. I don't wannnna deal with it.

Bastard.

Until there are NONE, Let's all Rescue One.

As you might know, my dogs are my addiction. They are so full of personality and amaze me each day how intelligent of an animal they are. I don't even say I need to go to work anymore, Guinness knows that the water bottle being filled and a lunch packed is a sign mom needs to go. She goes and sits in her crate waiting for a treat.

Because of my Guinness and my Finnegan, I found the S'Wheaten Rescues which rescues Soft Coated Wheaten Terriers, based in Kansas City, MO. I have been blessed with so much knowledge from this group and really at the end of the day could of saved a lot of money on medical expenses because of the knowledge they share. With a core foundation, volunteers across the United States not only help foster dogs that have been turned in for one reason or another, they help rescue Wheaten's being abandoned in kill shelters or are released from breeders/hoarders because they are done with them, and also work on cross country transports to take a Wheaten to its forever home. I have not had a chance to participate in a transport but from what I hear, it is an amazing experience, I hope I get the chance one day.

A little over a month ago, four dogs, two males and two females were picked up from a hoarder. They were so matted they could hardly walk. Once they were cleaned up, it was determined one female was actually a Male and the other was pregnant. Shortly thereafter, the pups were here. A camera was set up and on a daily basis, we have watched them grow and mourned the loss of them. See the puppies here. Because Kate (the momma) never received proper care, she had worms and unknowingly, we all watched her transfer them to her pups while they nursed. It was heartbreaking to know the ones we loved to watch were gone, I can only imagine what Wendy (the fearless leader) went through caring for them and hearing their cries. Today there are only two left and still entertain us on the web.

Next time you see that puppy in the window at the Petstore, please keep walking. Buying from the petstore continues to justify the need for the breeders and inhumane conditions these dogs are forced to live in. Be sure to take a look at the dogs that are available for adoption and you can see the shape the puppymill survivors came into the rescue in. Also read the post below to hear Lola's sad tell, another puppymill dog released.

If adoption isn't an option, consider donating today!

LOLA

L- Lovely
O- Our Friend
L- Loving
A- Amazing


I am sorry to tell everyone that Lola has had to be put to sleep today. While doing research and calling numerous vets in the area for opinions, second opinions etc, this morning, Things were not looking good. I took her back to the Vet that she saw last week, for him to reexamine her and either confirm or deny the prognosis. Things were not good for Lola. The tumor that had presented itself to us on Saturday, was not only large, but was blocking or contained her opening to the ureter. (This was why she was not having any urination since Saturday.) The vet offered to try and cut open the tumor and try to see if he could remove most of it and find the ureter opening, but there were no guarantees. The removal may not work. She could have very hard issues using the bathroom. The tumor could regrow. She may have more inside of her... Which is common with this type of tumor. At best she would need to see a specialist and undergo extensive surgery and prolonged Chemotherapy. While all this would carry no guarantee of "fixing" the problem. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make, but while talking with Wendy and Topaz about all the information given, I knew in my heart that Lola would be in the least amount of pain and suffering if i just let her go now. She was a blessing, a wonderfully sweet dog, That while we didn't have her long we loved her. She had the best four weeks of her life here with our family. She had run of a house, kids to pet her and cater to every whim, she had a "brother" Hurley to look up to. She made great strides in trusting us and I am so grateful to Lola for loving me. My only wish is that everyone who reads Lola's story know that her life in the Mill Caused all of this! EVERY TIME SOMEONE BUYS A DOG FROM A PET STORE.... YOU DO THIS TO ANOTHER LOLA. A wonderful mother that was bred and bred... caused to have extreme health issues that would cause her to lose her life. I wish all of you could have the chance to love a Lola, and experience the unconditional love that she gave to us as a family, even though her abusers for her entire life were humans. I was there when i picked her up and carried her to freedom, i was there every minute for the four weeks we had to love her, and I was there when i carried her away from the suffering of disease. I loved her with all my heart and in her last moments promised that wonderful little soul that I would do something in her honor. So with that I ask for your help. Just like we did with all the puppies.. We need to spread the word about what Puppy mills are doing to poor dogs like Lola. Do not let her die in vain. Join peaceful protests against the mills, tell your friends and neighbors about Lola's story, and most of all continue to support our rescue by giving funds, so that we may go and get more Lola's that are in need of our help. It is very costly to save a Mill dog. And we can only do this with wonderful people like you on our side.

I will close by saying this. I would do it all again in a heart beat. Not one second of our families time or efforts were wasted, We loved Lola and will greatly miss her, but know that she is in a better place. Join us by doing all that we can to prevent this from happening to another dog....

Thank you all so much for all that you do

Stacy, Chad, Tyler, Brendon, Blake and Hurley Jackson