THAT Guy

You know the one. The one that drives like a complete jackass. The one that it is almost a matter of time BEFORE he is in an accident. The one that wish would get into an accident? Yeah - well I not only met him, I introduced my bumper to his on Sunday. URRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.


So - I was having a very productive day. Went to church, ran a thousand errands and just had finished up at Lowe's ordering a new back door that has a dog door in it for Guinness. Yeah. So anyway - back to my story.

Now to leave Lowe's parking lot, there are two exits to get you onto the I-35 service road. Well - I choose to use the one that is a 3 way stop and shared with Walmart. The 4TH direction doesn't stop as it is cars coming off the Service Road. I patiently waited my turn as it is always a busy intersection. Well, when it is my turn, I proceed to turn left so I can then make my right onto the service road. As I am turning JACKASS approaches the stop sign across from me. I note that JACKASS does a rolling stop and cuts in front of the next car in line. The next thing I know, JACKASS is now on my left hand side almost parallel to my car. Now for those of you in far off lands - you can only make a right had turn - in other words - he was being a JACKASS - my new name for him.

I safely pull out onto the feeder road and proceed to the far left hand lane. Yep - JACKASS follows me out and gets directly behind me. Well my 4 cylinder car with zero get up and go does not accelerate fast enough for JACKASS. So, he flies around me on my right hand side. Of course, he does this with no regard and almost side swipes another SUV that was coming out of Exit #2 from Walmart's parking lot. The SUV was fortunate enough to serve and miss.

I don't know why, but JACKASS then decides he needs to be in my lane and comes on over. Prior to him coming over the traffic was moving and the light ahead was green. I do not know what he was doing or why but JACKASS came to an abrupt stop in front of me way back from the light. I did what I could do, slammed on the breaks, said a prayer, and avoided a direct impact, but hit him anyway.

I get out of my car but before I can say anything, JACKASS is on the phone with 911. I must quote him "No, no one is hurt." How does he know - he never says a word to me. So, i just get in car, roll down the window and wait. I wish I would of taken a picture because JACKASS then proceeded to get out a camera and take pictures of both our cars, walking around them and taking them from all kinds of angles while we are still on the service road.

The cops - yes two patrol cars - show up and we are escorted around the block to take care of business. Again, both of us told the cops on multiple occasions that neither of us where hurt. Thankfully I didn't get a ticket but I am just pissed that it happened. It is important to note that I have a scratch and a dent on my bumper. JACKASS' vehicle has no damage. Even tells the cops there is no damage to his truck.

I took my Driver's Crash Report and headed home. I unload the car, put away my groceries and have my vent moment with my mom. It is important to know that maybe an hour has passed since my first encounter with JACKASS. Next thing I know my phone is ringing. It is my insurance company calling to verify that I have been in an accident.

What the fuck chuck. Yep - I hit the JACKASS that is trying to get money. He agrees that there is no damage to his car BUT he suffered a back injury. One that didn't appear in the first 30 minutes where he told everyone that he was fine, but one that appeared before he got back to his home in Manor, 30 miles away. Needless to say - this is a battle for my insurance company but it just pisses me off to no end.

In any event - given my prior back issues, I steered clear of running yesterday and skipped my swim workout this morning. I feel fine so will head back to spin class in the morning.

JACKASS!